My Favourite Headlines from The Onion and Clickhole

2020 isn’t over yet, and I think we can all use a good chuckle whenever possible. I can usually count on satire news sites The Onion and Clickhole to make me laugh. I compiled my favourite headlines here mainly so I can revisit them. I recommend reading the articles too. The Onion has some of the best comedy writers. I actually think you have to be a genius to be able to write jokes this immature.

1. I Put On A Fat Suit To Understand What It’s Like To Be Your Mom — Basically a series of Yo Mama jokes.

2. New Study Finds Staring Out From Balcony With Best Friends Strongest Indicator That This Your City, Your Time — This put me in the habit of saying, “My city, my time,” whenever I’m out on the town with friends.

3. Throwing A Hail Mary: Christopher Nolan Is Furiously Recutting ‘Dunkirk’ As A Female-Driven Coming-Of-Age Story In Hopes It Will Win An Oscar — Just so ridiculous.

4. Karl Lagerfeld Horrified By Uninspired, Garish Tunnel Of Light Coming Toward Him — They published this immediately after his death so this was extra insensitive.

5. I Can’t Imagine My Wedding Day Without You Sitting There Uncomfortably At A Table Full Of People You Don’t Know — I showed this one to a friend who just had a wedding and she didn’t find it funny. I laughed all the harder as I read the article out loud to her.

6. Shameful Bullying: Cruel Kids At School Are Laughing At This Boy Just Because His Name Is Boner Von Rimjob And His Pants Fell Down During His Solo Tuba Recital — LOL

7. Nerves Of Steel: This Guy Is Scarfing Down The Trader Joe’s Free Samples Without Even Doing That Pretend Curious Glance At The Product’s Box — Me at Costco.

8. Hard To Watch: Talbots Just Went On An Angry Twitter Rant Asking Why They Can’t Be One Of Those Dorky Brands That Everyone Randomly Decided Is Actually Cool Now — My personal favourite.

l’ll probably keep adding to this list as I find new ones. Let me know your favourite Onion headlines in the comments below.

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